Breaking Free From Co-Dependency: A Journey of Self Worth

Breaking Free From Codependency: A Journey of Self Worth

When *Emily came to me, her heart was heavy. She was in despair and felt that God had abandoned her. Through our sessions I discovered that she was one of the kindest, warmest, most loving individuals I’d ever met. But despite all the light she gave to others, she felt lowly, dimmed by the toxic and codependent relationship she was trapped in.

Her partner was self-centered, dismissive, manipulative and emotionally detached. No matter how much love she poured into the relationship, it always felt like she was running on empty. And yet, those rare moments of connection—those fleeting sparks of attention and excitement—kept her coming back.

She told me, “I hate how I feel about myself when I’m with him. But when he notices me, even for a moment, I feel alive. And then…I crash again.”

She didn’t want to keep living this cycle, but she didn’t know how to break free.

Emily didn’t just want to escape the relationship—she wanted to escape the version of herself she’d become because of it.

Together, we began to rebuild her inner world, and create a vision of the person she wished she could be, step by step:

I encouraged Emily to draw on her natural warmth and kindness—but this time, to pour some of it into herself.

We created a plan:

First, Emily discovered her voids; what got her into this unhealthy relationship, and, when she tried to leave, what kept her going back to him.

Over time, she built a support system of healthy individuals who saw her worth, even when she couldn’t.

She began setting small, meaningful goals to rediscover her purpose and what truly made her feel fulfilled. This is how she created a new vision of the person she so much wanted to be: capable, grounded, and strong.

We worked on exercises to clarify her values—and she started to see, crystal clear, how this relationship was pulling her away from the life she deeply wanted.

Emily started channeling her natural giving spirit into healthy outlets—volunteering, self-care, reconnecting with hobbies and work she loved, and setting boundaries to protect her emotional energy. Most importantly, she deepened her connection to Hashem (God) and opened herself up to receiving an abundance of blessings that before, she couldn't see.

This process hasn’t been a straight path—it’s been filled with moments of forward movement, setbacks, and resilience. But Emily was determined to work hard. Today, she is clearer than ever on who she wants to become, and she has the tools she needs to get there…one day at a time.

She no longer needs to chase validation from someone who couldn’t see her value—because she sees it in herself.

She feels a deep sense of self-worth rooted in her values and purpose.

Her support system continues to keep her grounded and focused.

She uses her loving, giving nature to create a life that’s vibrant and meaningful.

Watching Emily’s transformation has been one of the most beautiful parts of my work. She’s proof that, no matter how lost you feel, there’s always a way to come home to yourself.

If you’re feeling stuck in a toxic dynamic, please know this: You don’t have to stay there. There’s hope, there’s help, and there’s a brighter future waiting for you.

You just have to take that first step forward...

*Name changed to protect identity